The Teacher’s Tale

The Teacher’s Tale

Here begins the teacher’s tale:

Once upon a time, in Bushwick, Brooklyn,

There lived a sixth grader, the embodiment of sin

And a first year teacher, who, innocent as a daisy,

Had a confrontation with this child that about drove her crazy.

First let me forewarn you that this tale is quite gory,

With that disclaimer aside, I’ll continue my story.


His name I won’t share, in case you he’s your friend,

Although for his actions, his academic career should end.

He was a hellion in school, an absolute fright,

The administration couldn’t control him, try as they might.

In middle school a student can only be suspended thrice

And this gem of a boy had already been twice.


Our new teacher, the daisy, had been having it rough.

The administration was screwing her, and she tried to be tough,

She wanted to teach, was that too much to ask?

But the principal kept shoving his foot up her ass.

The icing on the cake was her sentence of doom:

A full program of teaching the in-school-suspension room.


But she gave it a try, as she knew she must do.

She entered the room of madness (you haven’t a clue).

She devised a curriculum, start with a movie,

It was Rated R! The students should have been groovy.

But not this one boy, he ran around the room.

Even the students were annoyed with him soon.


So the teacher said, “Please, take a seat! Make it quick!”

And the student replied, “Bitch, suck my dick!”

Not only in her face did he scream it out loud,

But he also pulled out his penis, to show the whole crowd.

Her initial reaction was to laugh, “Is that a toothpick?

Shall I floss with that, you crass, ignorant little prick?”


Instead she remained calm and placed a security call,

But in this school, security did not roam the hall;

They sat downstairs, eating doughnuts and laughing

(While upstairs, students and teachers were clashing).

So at the end of the period, she reported it to the AP,

Who said sternly and quickly to her, “Come with me.”


To the principal they went, that mindless fool,

He spent his days in his office, asleep in his drool.

He said it was a shame, such a horrible thing,

But they couldn’t suspend him, just in case in the spring,

He did something worse which would claim is his suspension…

As for the teacher’s psychological damage, he made no mention.


She was depressed, frustrated, furious and more,

And after crying to a peer, she knew what was in store:

She called her old boss at a museum that minute

Inquired about her old job, was anyone in it?

Her boss begged her to come back, please, return!

The young teacher thought, “Ha! Let this school burn!”


After filling out forms for the horrible child,

She re-entered the principal’s office, her eyes wild,

She explained, with a few tears, that she just wanted a class,

And if he didn’t give her one, he could kiss her ass.

She said she wouldn’t return for the rest of the week,

And on Monday, her new program, she could come to him to seek.


As she walked out her door, he threatened a letter in her file,

She smugly mentioned her old job, a cousin of Museum Mile,

That would take her back quickly if he didn’t comply

(And she resisted the urge to spit in his eye).

As she left the school, she was exhausted but proud,

She had stood up for herself, spoken her opinion out loud.


Four days passed, and she returned to the school,

To see the same student taken out in handcuffs (sadly cool),

But not for exposing himself to her in such disgrace,

But for pulling out a blunt and a knife in a teacher’s face…

And in her mailbox, her new program was waiting,

Never again, would any student incite her hating.


And that ends my tales of rejoicings of sorrows,

She’s still teaching today and she will be tomorrow.